New Rules For King o’ Games At Geekend 2010

The best way to address the uncertainty of a new Geekend is to try to codify chaos with a set of rules that no one will obey.


As you are doubtless aware, each of our three Geekends has crowned a King o’ Games on Sunday of the three-day event. HRH Topogigo was the inaugural King o’ Games, seizing the crown through laser-like focus on games and victory conditions while lesser souls succumbed to drink and degradation. HRH Juggernaut took the crown the following year, at a Geekend that saw the rise of Royal Houses (powered by the brokering of Geekers, to position pretenders and contenders to claim the throne). The final meeting — the fabled G2K — saw HRH What If? do some fine broken-field running to navigate the increasingly violent Clash of Houses to secure a place in the finals, where he stared down Royal Pretender Erk to claim the crown while down to his last bid in Liar’s Dice.

HRH What If? claims his crown

So we’ve had kings from all over — scholar kings like HRH Topogigo, political kings who marshaled powerful barons to claim the crown like HRH Juggernaut, and usurper kings who struck like lightning in the vein of HRH What If?

What we’ve never had is a King o’ Games who could defend his throne … and the last King o’ Games — HRH What If? — may have cursed the kingdom by destroying the King’s trophy from G2K during a drunken outburst in an otherwise unremarkable game of Battle Cry.

But the Trophy has been Reforged, and a dedicated Band of Brothers (among them two Kings o’ Games) met earlier this month at the merest hint of Geekend Renewed … so I think it is safe to say the grand tradition of Power, Glory, and Shame as embodied by His Royal Highness The King o’ Games is ready to resume!

But how will we crown the next king?

Read on …

As the diagram above indicates, selection of King o’ Games is simple.

As was the case ten years ago, selection of the new King o’ Games will be determined by a Sunday afternoon game of Liar’s Dice.

There are six spots at the table.

THREE are reserved for current or past Kings o’ Games … BUT … should a King not appear to claim His spot, these spots will be assigned to Holders of Geekers.

Further … if a King should use His Royal Favor to nominate a CHAMPION to compete on His behalf, or even (egad!) appoint an HEIR APPARENT to compete for the crown in his stead, then these THREE SEATS ROYAL may end up occupied by anyone!

Anyone … except Goldenboat (The Merlin Figure) or Ulm (The Pope), owing to the hallowed tradition of the separation of Geek Church and State!

Very well.

Three seats accounted for. Three remain. How shall they be assigned?

ONE SEAT is guaranteed to a HOLDER OF GEEKERS. Geekers will be distributed by Ulm and I throughout the Geekend according to our own arcane rules, which we will make up on the spot. Mostly you will need to win games and amuse us to earn Geekers. Additional seats may be claimed by Holders of Geekers, depending on Royal Whim, as noted above.

ONE SEAT will be awarded by GENERAL ACCLAIM, as guided by the popular sentiment of the assembled Geeks, with Ulm and Goldenboat presiding.

THE FINAL SEAT is reserved for THE BACKSTABBER …! We will have a full, seven-player game of Diplomacy running all weekend, with turns due every couple hours, and the winner of this game will qualify for the finals. Goldenboat will administer the game, which will begin on Friday night.

There you go. The RULES of Royal Succession, Geekend style! Let them be preserved for all time … or until we throw them out without warning or notice!!


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